My grandmother is sick, which is really not that surprising considering she has been unwell my entire life. She always had a way about her though, a way of hiding just how sick she was; now one look at her and you know.
Sitting in the hospital room, seeing her all hooked up to all sorts of nonsense. Going back and forth between her apartment and the actual room we were sitting in. I could not help it I got frustrated. I started fussing at God, telling Him that I just did not think this was needed. Why did she have to be in pain? Why did she have to be so confused? How in the world was this in anyway glorifying to God?
The most interesting thing to me about prayer is how God answers. Sometimes we hear an answer, and then we move on to the next thing, and we leave God right as He is beginning a conversation. Do we really think all God knows is yes and no?
God spoke to me in that hospital room and He has continued to speak to me concerning my grandmother. If we truly believe that our religion is relational then why are we not having conversations with our Father? It has been two days since I stomped my foot and tried to tell God how to do His job, and He is still speaking. I just have to praise Him for that, His words even when scolding me speak peace to my soul and give me the courage I need to face the day.
Back to the hospital room, He not so gently reminded me of how it even worked out that my mother and I were already on our way to Fort Smith when we got the call saying to come.
He then, reminded me that instead of fussing I should be sitting there thanking Him that I could be sitting in the hospital room. I should have been appreciating the time I had with her and praising him that I could be there to support my own mother.
Most importantly He told me that she is His daughter and that He loves her more than I ever could. I was sitting there fussing at the man who had given His life to let her into His house. What claim do I have over my grandmother? Compared to Him, I have none.
He made it clear to me, that I do not get to decide what glorifies Him and what does not. That her whole life could not be summed up in her death; she taught Sunday School longer than most people even live. Her life’s mission was to make sure that every child knew the saving love of Jesus Christ before leaving the Children’s Department.
I am Peter, pulling God over into a corner trying to protect His reputation. Worried that He does not have all His stuff together, I am willing to offer advice on how to run the show. Only for Jesus to rebuke me, and remind me God’s ways are different than man’s ways. My faith cannot be tied up in the ideas of men, my hope must be grounded in the way’s of God. (Mark 8, read it!)
Sometimes I pray so hard for an answer, an answer I am just sure will change the whole situation. Only for Him to speak, and after hearing His voice, I hang my head and simply say, “Yes Sir.”
This is a challenging lesson. Brothers and sisters in Christ, we cannot remain content in a question and answer relationship with our Father. Christ died so that I can know God, I intend on knowing Him to the fullest extent possible while in this world.
When you pray, listen to God. When He answers, pray again. Keep listening.
Talk to Him. Listen, you never know it could spark a conversation that might just change your life.